Am sad

I have to let go but my heart is pain
cause it’s has been torn open, it’s
not another excuse , it’s not another
lie, am sorry that am sad , am sorry
that I feel lonely inside my heart, I
normally feel like this once a month,
sadness finds me during the night
and makes a deep hole in my heart,
am sorry I feel like this, my day is a mess
today, I tired to get over this emptiness ,
Am very tired,I would love to change but don’t
know where to start, I am sad deep inside
but I tired to smile, please don’t ask me if
I am ok , I might do something stupid and
open up to you, I am scared to let
people get close and they leave at the end,
sometimes in my life I feel as nobody understands
me, I don’t want to be left behind,I know I have
been crying a lot lately , I cry for the person I was
before and the person I am now, am scared cause I
don’t have a clue about what the future has planned
for me